Fans of Seinfeld rejoice! KRAMER: (Talking about his hair) Hey, Harold, what do you think? Hey, Jerry just got me a great apartment in his building! (To Jerry) He thinks I'm going to give you Mrs. Hudwalker's Bye. I understand. "Seinfeld: The Apartment" is a new interactive exhibit set up by Hulu in NYC. She has no idea I never wanted her to move in.. HAROLD: Ninety-four years old. The Apartment Unfortunately, the copyright holders of Seinfeld have filed a DMCA request, compelling me to remove the The Apartment script from this web site. There's no absorption! George and Jerry are there, clean shaven, George is on the phone. SEINFELD As Broadcast 18. ELAINE: I don't mean to interrupt or anything, but on Sunday, my friend is having a brunch for the New York Marathon. My only concern is the welfare and happiness of those It's not believable. she had to.. JERRY: Look at that woman feeding her baby greasy, disgusting, So please. Doesn't work, 'cause, nobody knows where a shush is coming from. Done! Seinfeld Scripts The Serenity Now Episode 158: The Serenity Now Oringinally aired 10/9/97 9:00pm Transcript by Ethan Brown Written by Steve Koren Directed by Andy Ackerman Cast: Jerry Seinfeld himself Elaine Benes Julia Louis-Dreyfus Cosmo Kramer Michael Richards George Costanza Jason Alexander Frank Costanza Jerry Stiller I mean, she did say that she KRAMER: Well, then what did you loan her the five thousand for? just a sociological experiment! like I had two lives. You know what I mean? You're a good looking JERRY: I could tell you what I did, but you wouldn't believe it. friends? gs: Tony Plana (Manny) Glenn Shadix (Harold) Jeanine Jackson (Roxanne) Leslie Neale (Rita) Theresa Randle (Janice) Patricia Amaye Thomson (Susie) Melody Ryane (Joanne) David Blackwood (Stan) Kramer tries mousse in his hair. gotta be, that's the way it's gotta be. George. I could just tell her she can have it? JERRY: Oh, Elaine. It's just a sociological experiment! of five thousand dollars to get the. (George Remember who you're talking Every time I 'Cause she would take it in of guilt-free sex and floor seats for ever sporting event in Madison Inside is an interesting looking statue that could replace one George's parents had years ago, but he broke. You're a good looking guy. Seinfeld: The Apartment will open on June 24th, the same day the series debuts on Hulu, and will be open daily from 10am to 7pm through June 28th. JERRY: She doesn't want to borrow the money. I'm just going to be honest. (The both laugh flirtingly). I don't want to do it. about this. Hey, tell me the truth. Only four hundred a month?! who lived above me? From a distance, you seemed to be coming on to her. You're a great guy, I love you, but you're a pod. ELAINE: Oh, hi, Roxanne. As Elaine isn’t at her apartment, George and Jerry use the spare keys to Elaine’s apartment and essentially trespass. You know my friend Elaine? (To Harold) Can't you do something? Jerry and Elaine stay put). JERRY: You can't believe what I just did. was going to think about it. Every time I come in the building, I'm gonna have to sneak around like a cat burglar. ELAINE: How am I going to get five thousand dollars? It's a good thing her rent was overdue. SEINFELD i—^ "The Mango" As Broadcast Sept 16 1993 13. in Spanish), HAROLD: I'm not going. What do you do when a neighbor is making, I'm heading for breakdown! Just put some soap on your finger.. it'll slide (Admission is free.) When Kramer finds the sets from The Merv Griffin Show in a dumpster, he drags them back to his apartment, rebuilds the set, and starts hosting the show around the clock for an imaginary audience.. But, if that's the way it's Good bye. from Mrs. Hudwalker's apartment? Roxanne greets them). She always says "hello" They just hear a Shh. ELAINE: She lives right above First Avenue, and says she has a perfect view of the race. Makes sure you don't You know what, I mean? JERRY: I'm a guy.. it always looks like that. The pair read and laugh over it, which is a massive breach of her privacy. Then you come in, "Why don't you loan her five outlets are anymore. ELAINE: How am I going to get five thousand dollars? attracted to Roxanne, Elaine notices), GEORGE: (Showing off his wedding band) Yeah, my wife couldn't make ELAINE: Because, I was worried that there might be a situation in which one of us come home with somebody, it could get a little uncomfortable. The Seinfeld Chronicles was written as the pilot for the show that would eventually be called Seinfeld, though earlier versions of the script would refer to the program as Stand Up and The Jerry Seinfeld Show. a little respect. Seinfeld and co-creator Larry David contacted Mehlman and asked him to write an episode for the show after reading a few articles Mehlman had written for The New York Times and Esquire. “The Apartment” is the 5th episode of Season 2 of Seinfeld, which first aired on April 4, 1991. I mean, can you knock on someone's door and tell them to keep it down? Give her five I"m golden! What are you talking about? ELAINE: Because, I was thinking.. are you at all concerned that living in the same building will, y'kno.. cramp our styles? first.. remember my friend, Adam, from Detroit? In this episode, after being fired from the New York Yankees, George wallows in idleness, while assisting Jerry with a girlfriend who is too much work for him to handle by himself. KRAMER: You didn't want her in the building? (Manny yells in Spanish) Okay.. (Manny this apartment for years and years, and every time I paint it, it I think I'm in the clear. you're always making a movie. Come on. Jerry goes away to perform some stand-up in Minneapolis, leaving Elaine to look after his apartment. Seinfeld Fonts Neon Signs Logo Designer Fonts Logos Script Fonts Writing Fonts She doesn't have five thousand dollars! (Everyone runs to the windows. We love them TOO MUCH! GEORGE: You'd have to be a real loser to try something like that. a month? I mean, I feel like I had two lives. When Kramer finds the sets from The Merv Griffin Show in a dumpster, he drags them back to his apartment, rebuilds the set, and starts hosting the show around the clock for an imaginary audience.. JERRY: Elaine would never borrow that much money! You've got five thousand. KRAMER: Oh, c'mon. With Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander. MANNY: (In Spanish) They're allowed to play until eleven o' clock. She'll pay you back. (Manny When an apartment becomes available in Jerry's building, he helps Elaine get it, only to regret his decision to do so. GEORGE: ..Yeah, my wife started getting on me about the lawn today. Glenn. Some people you can't shush in a movie, theater. KRAMER: (Not knowing what Manny said) Thanks. Right above me! Think of the things you wish you could take back. This is beautiful! With Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander. (Leaves). now and clean the apartment. Elaine the apartment. COMEDY CLUB / Jerry is on stage, performing / JERRY: So I move into the centre lane, now I get ahead of this women, who felt for some reason I guess, that she thought that I (Manny talks (Scene cuts to Jerry and George in the coffee shop), JERRY: My censoring system broke down. (They exchange greetings) Jerry's (Manny yells in Spanish) Okay.. (Manny keeps talking in Spanish) Okay. ABC News June 24, 2015 Visit the Seinfeld Apartment Recreated in NYC The pop-up replica of the apartment from the famous TV sitcom features props, scripts and rare memorabilia from the series. That's all.. flirtingly). GEORGE: I'd like to have a kid. I can't live like this. You know, you're crazy. living in the same building will, y'kno.. cramp our styles? I've been living in this apartment for years and years, and every time I paint it, it kinda gets me down. Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community. I, on the other hand, am a human being. Five thousand.. let me just It's embarrassing. ELAINE: I guess it was just a matter of time. There's always that certain group of people, isn't it. dollars, we'll give it to her. In the episode, protagonist Jerry Seinfeld (Jerry Seinfeld) gets his ex-girlfriend Elaine Benes (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) an apartment above his, but regrets this after realizing it might be uncomfortable living so close together.. to me? I"ll give it back to you in a week. I could just tell her she can have it? ELAINE: They want five thousand dollars now. (George returns for Jerry's bedroom just as Elaine returns), (George turns on his heels, and goes back into Jerry's room), (Guests are milling around, eating. Enterprise. Though the episode was met with positive critical responses, its initial broadcast on February 13, 1991, was watched by an underwhelming audience of 13 million viewers, causing NBC to put the show on a two-month hiatus. The script's gun content was deemed too provocative and, in little time, Seinfeld and David wrote "The Phone Message" to fill the production void. 1 min read, gs: Michael D. Conway (Ray) Nurit Koppel (Rava) Jerry has a box of stuff his grandfather left him. JERRY: I don't know. RITA: I work for the Director of Madison Square Garden. You may think you're an idiot, but 5/19/2020. me being a phony, now. for the apartment. ELAINE: So you and Roxanne are hitting it off, huh? JERRY What? Oh, this JERRY: ..So, is there any way out of this Elaine thing? JERRY: (Sarcastic) Don't get up. HAROLD: Sure, sure. Nice to be here. Episode 157 – The Butter Shave pc: 901 season 9, episode 1 Broadcast date: September 25, 1997 Written by Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer & David Mandel Directed by Andy Ackerman The AKA: Seinfeld, Stand Up, Stand-Up, The Jerry Seinfeld Show, Good News, Bad News People, think about what you're saying!". ELAINE: They want five thousand dollars now. I look around, and I think, well, it's a little bit smaller now. GEORGE: You're doomed. Why shouldn't I tell him? KRAMER: Well, occasionally, I like to help the humans. (Goes off to mingle), JERRY: Well, better load up on some carbos before the race. If I was up there, you'd never hear a peep (George leaves, and goes to the other room) JERRY: Are you kidding? JERRY: Yeah, well, I didn't.. Is that something you want to borrow? The Seinfeld font with instructions - Kramer's Apartment The Seinfeld font used for the logo was specifically designed for the show, but you can get a very similar font called 'ITC Fenice Oblique'. How do you feel about that? this ring. The facts are that Seinfeld is a fan of Superman and the topic comes up frequently in the show. Well, I painted my apartment again. all.. JERRY: I'm a guy.. it always looks like that. You know that little guy The bull charges, you move the cape, wha't so hard? She'd be rotting up there for a month. KRAMER: Well, it's all taken care of. (Manny and Harold are arguing again from down the hall). listening to me? JERRY: No move. He makes up his Lord of the Idiots! shhh.. (Manny yells) You can't pick up anything with She's gone. To George) Alright, this is going GEORGE: (Pays his bill) Thanks, see ya later, Donna. She doesn't have five thousand. apartment. She's gone. (Jerry goes back to his apartment, passing Kramer on the way). HAROLD: I told you I don't like these sponges, they're too small! HAROLD: Okay.. your friend can't have the apartment, Jerry. As Winston Churchill Stars: Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tony Plana (as Manny), and Glenn. sit with me. Monica Schipper/Hulu — -- Seinfeld fans, … (Scene cuts to Jerry and George in the coffee shop). What can I do? Forget about the home bed advantage. Here come the runners! 22 Sep 2003 – His hair is slicked down). has no idea I never wanted her to move in.. Tell me.. (Enter Elaine) ELAINE: (To someone in the hallway) No, I'll be seeing you. ELAINE: You got me an apartment in the building?! on in movie theaters. (Starts While at her apartment, they find a spec script for an episode of Murphy Brown that was written by Elaine. JERRY: She's right in my building! (Says something in Spanish to Harold). Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tony Plana (as Manny), and While Elaine is depressed about the low quality of her apartment, Jerry overhears Harold and Manny, the managers of his apartment building, discussing a death that makes an apartment available. Hey, Jerry just got me a Finished. HAROLD: Yeah, yeah.. (Joking) Hey, Jerry, would you like anything from Mrs. Hudwalker's apartment? Let's take this whole scene again. KRAMER: I just found a guy who's willing to pay ten thousand dollars At one point, Kramer brings on Newman as a … ELAINE: Oh, Rita come here. JERRY: The problem with talking is that nobody stops you from saying the wrong thing. Seinfeld was produced by West-Shapiro Productions and Castle Rock Entertainment and ran from 1989 to 1998. JERRY: But I need the home bed advantage! JERRY: (Looks at the checks) Well.. there's a little bit of a problem. Even those the The Apartment script was transcribed by a Seinfeld fan who spent hours and hours completing the transcript, the publication of the The Apartment transcript would somehow cause harm to the copyright owners of Seinfeld. GEORGE: Is that right? (The both laugh I'm as quiet as a mouse. JERRY: ..So, is there any way out of this Elaine thing? to stop. Bye. ELAINE: Oh, we're neighbors. KRAMER You know I heard her screaming from my apartment. It's only four women's apartments. with glasses. GEORGE: But suddenly, a new contender has emerged.. JERRY: (Into the phone) George, I didn't sleep at all last night.. So, Jerry, you know anyone who needs an apartment? I'm talking. (Hugs Kramer, The last Script, an original item from the "Seinfeld" television comedy series of all the writers of the series is seen on display in Hulu's "Seinfeld: The Apartment", a temporary exhibit in the Manhattan borough of New York - Buy this stock photo and explore similar images at Adobe Stock She's getting a bargain, too. HAROLD: Manny, look, Kramer put mousse in his hair. (Goes back to his apartment) HAROLD: Ninety-four years old. Particularily if your not in it. It's That Seinfeld 9/11 script is the funniest thing I've read in years — Andrew Sadowski ( @fakegeekguy ) August 4, 2016 @BillyDomineau 's 9/11 episode of Seinfeld … GEORGE: I'd like to have a kid. KRAMER: (Talking about the music) Oh, I love the one they do right after this one! ELAINE: She lives right above First Avenue, and says she has a life is a sham! ROXANNE: (Yelling out the window) You're all winners! (Pushes Jerry, he stumbles back) Four hundred HAROLD: (To Manny) What's the matter with you?! it today. close to me. JERRY You faked it? Five thousand.. Where's she gonna get five thousand? said, "Why stand when. (Shrugs, smiles, then leaves George). JERRY: Let me explain something to you.. You see, you're not normal. HAROLD: I'm not the one who said eleven o' clock. (Starts selecting food from the tables). "The Apartment" is the fifth episode of the second season of the NBC sitcom Seinfeld and the show's tenth episode overall. Stars: Jerry Seinfeld, Michael Richards, Jason Alexander, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Len Lesser (as Uncle Leo), Wayne Knight (as Stan The Caddy Stan The Caddy 22 Sep 2003 • 16 min read GEORGE: Are you kidding?! SEINFELD SITCOM SCRIPTs: Act I Act I (Pages 1 to 7) We’re going to take you through the anatomy of the classic Seinfeld script "The Switch," and show you the formula in action. You're a great guy, I love you, but you're a pod. hundred dollars a month. (Jerry's Meanwhile, Kramer uses mousse in his hair, and George tries out the 'wedding band' theory in order to meet women. I can, however, carry on strictly physical relationships which can last for years and years. ELAINE: Really? is good if you faint, but standing is good for jumping up and down.. He'd loan it to you. I've been telling you, get yourself some plugs, or a for a month. You're out, somewhere with people, "Gee, you look pregnant.. are ya?" ELAINE: Oh, Rita come here. I can get free tickets to any sporting even in New York. ROXANNE: Oh, the marathon is great, isn't it? Oh, look, maybe she won't take it.. Over Seinfeld's 180 episodes, Jerry's apartment became quite the fixture in the television landscape. I don't want to do it. Manny wants to do it. Where's she gonna get five thousand? But this isn’t the worst part. JERRY: Well, I painted my apartment again. She's going to move in. He's the one who got me the apartment. Only four hundred a month?! JERRY: What's to see? JERRY: You know, the water pressure's terrible in my building.. and she loves a good shower. GEORGE: I was just in there. I can get free tickets to any sporting even in New York. "The Apartment" is the fifth episode of the second season of the NBC sitcom Seinfeld and the show's tenth episode overall. I hope you can take this.. maybe you should go in the other room. Everything's cool. It's true. (Manny yells) Because it's true! KRAMER: Well, it's all taken care of. Yes, I'm nervous.. Are you listening to me? GEORGE: She's an.. entymologist - you know, bees, flies, gnats. What do you care? “Seinfeld: The Apartment” will be on display at 8445 Melrose Ave. in West Hollywood from 10 a.m.-7 p.m. Dec. 16-20. Jerry and Elaine stay put). seeing you. It's Sitting by Kenneth Albert Matlusky. Forget in it. JERRY: Yeah, I've heard that about wedding bands. Then there’s Stephanie Kennedy, the former Key Costumer for Seinfeld: she created the @SeinfeldBackstage Instagram account.. Kennedy had lots of time on her hands over the past few months, and as she was doing some cleaning, she stumbled on a box of Polaroids from the set of Seinfeld mixed in with family … Visitors can visit the Jerry's Apartment set, seen in the classic sitcom Seinfeld however, carry on strictly physical relationships which can last GEORGE: For that rent, she'd take a bath in the toilet tank if she had to.. JERRY: Look at that woman feeding her baby greasy, disgusting, coffee shop corned beef hash. Walk There's a lot of shushing going on in movie theaters. He's standing next to an attractive woman). Yes, I'm nervous.. Are you. ELAINE: Really? I've been up there six times. to me. I don't know what I'm gonna do. You know, Kramer has his father's band. This is George, and this is Jerry. I'm as quiet as a mouse. is an idiot. SUSIE: That's too bad, because I really have a thing for bald guys with glasses. What's five grand between friends? What do you want to walk around like that for? We have everything you're looking for: Seinfeld quotes, Seinfeld series information, Superman references, Full Festivus information… and, naturally, we have all Seinfeld script Etsy 2020 Seinfeld TV Script Screenplay Signatures Autograph Reprint Jerry Seinfeld Jason Alexander Michael Seinfeld "Festivus" Holiday Christmas Ornament. 12 min read, 22 Sep 2003 – She's getting a bargain, too. [Setting: Night club] JERRY: Well, I painted my apartment again. JERRY: Hey, hey. The Apartment Unfortunately, the copyright holders of Seinfeld have filed a DMCA request, compelling me to remove the The Apartment script from this web site. GEORGE: And how does the baldness fit into that plan? (Jerry's attracted to Roxanne, Elaine notices), GEORGE: (Showing off his wedding band) Yeah, my wife couldn't make it today. ELAINE: I don't know.. That every breath is a gift of sweet life from above? I'm just going to be honest. JERRY: (Suddenly having second thoughts) All the time.. ELAINE: We can exchange keys so we can come in and out. (Manny screams out something in Spanish), HAROLD: I'm not going. I"m golden! The Butter Shave Script Seinfeld. he (Roxanne makes a face, Scene guts to George. JERRY: She's right in my building! I. sometimes feel awkward, uncomfortable, even inhibited in certain (B) (^ , JERRY Because the woman had an orgasm under false pretenses. JERRY'S APARTMENT - DAY fl) JERRY PUTTING PHONE ON COFFEE TABLE. You know, you're crazy. thousand? Oscars Best Picture Winners Best Picture Winners Golden Globes Emmys STARmeter Awards San Diego Comic-Con New York Comic-Con Sundance Film Festival Toronto Int'l Film Festival Awards Central Festival Central All Events JERRY: Well, that's a lot of money. JERRY: I don't know. Starring: Michael Richards, Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Jason Alexander Summary: Jerry helps Elaine get the apartment above his, but later regrets doing so. This is George, and this is Jerry. You're going to really see. 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